24 brought a lot of challenges.
I lost a lot. I struggled a lot.
I had to learn how to re-live my life- yup, every. single. aspect. I had to rely on friends & family (in the middle of pandemic) for almost everything. I had to put off doctors’ appointments for issues that were urgent. I had my limits tested at every single turn.
I lost…
- My ability to walk independently.
- My ability to turn over or adjust in bed
- My ability to use the restroom
- My ability to bend
- My ability to independently get up
- My ability to sit in a car
- My ability to sit in a normal chair
- My ability to dress/ undress myself
- My ability to stand up straight or independently
I had to trust the process & learn to live with a body that was on its own timeline.
It was & still is hard. I lost my sense of normal (in way more than just a global pandemic). I had to relearn how to do just about everything in my life.
But here I am, still fighting. I lost a lot this year, but I survived, and sometimes that’s all you can do.
This life is crazy & I never imagined I’d lose so much so quickly, but I did & here we are. But you know what I didn’t lose? My support system. Or my sarcasm (& sometimes dark sense of humor). I didn’t lose my house or a loved one- and honestly, that’s way more important to me.
This year tested my limits & pushed me hard(er than I needed to be). It’s still a struggle everyday (and it will be for a while). This stage of life is different. I wasn’t ready for it,& I certainly wasn’t given time to prepare. It’s hard to teach someone to care for you when you don’t even know what you need or how to do it. It’s stressful & tempers flare on more than one occasion.
I’m learning to cope. I’m figuring out little by little- with the help of an amazing support system. I’m learning to give myself a little more grace, learning some patience, & learning to trust my loved ones. It’s a process & it’s not pretty or easy, but that’s my life.
So, Here’s to year 25. Please be easy on me.
Here’s some exciting things in store for Year 25:
Carli Lyn 